heart

I have a confession. I wouldn't describe myself as psychic, but I do occasionally feel what others around me are feeling. More of an empath kind of thing really. Today, there was a great disturbance in the force, as if millions of voices cried out all at once in unspeakable anguish and torment and then suddenly, were silenced. It was the collective simultaneous screams of all the Mets and Boston Red Sox fans at the final out of the World Series. Oh, how it warmed my black heart. GO YANKEES!!!

loss

Today at work they had a blood drive. They wouldn't take mine. They said it caused crankiness and premature hair loss.

money

I just figured out what I'm going out for Halloween as: middle aged loser. I didn't feel like spending alot of money on a costume.

years

Huh? What happened to my weekend? I swear. It was just here a minute ago? I turn around and pffttt! Oh well, we're due for another weekend in... let's see.... SEVENTY TWO YEARS?!!!

some

Enough. Will you damn kids give the rabbit some fucking Trix already.

apple

Usually I stick to my 100% natural free diet. But today I had a salad. That means I’m safe to eat all the fried chicken, pork rinds, and Doritos I want. Doesn’t It? Next month, I’m going to eat an apple.

bonus

So, at work they’re looking for potential mottos or slogans that could be used for recruitment. I put a few in the suggestion box:

- Abandon hope all ye who enter here.
- My God, my God. Why hast thou forsaken me?

But I really think my third entry will be the winner:

- Arbeit Macht Frei.

Yeah, that’s it. I wonder if I’ll get a bonus?