driving

I know. I used to think that driving an Audi was the penultimate indicator of being a douche. But the cigar just left the Audi in the dust. Cigars not only display to the entire world that you are a phallic sucking megalomaniacal prick, but also that you must impose your douche stank on all those unlucky enough to be within 30 feet of your bloated ass. There is nothing in this world that is a more definitive indicator of being a douche than smoking a cigar. That is unless it's smoking a cigar while driving an Audi.